Take My Hand
by esthered
Summary: Sanzo has everything he wanted a penthouse, a car, wealth, and a person he loves Goku. What happens when Goku goes missing? Setting on an adventure to find him, he deciphers the danger hidden behind the innocent Goku. What happens when he finds him!
1. I Promised You

_Author's Note: _

_So, for those of you who loved **Under The Mask**; I'm back with another OOC Sanzo and Goku fic. This one is a little sadder, and more touching to the heart… So please read and review! Comments are greatly appreciated. _

'It was a tale of love, life and maybe despair-,' that phrase that just came out of the television was what could probably be used to describe Sanzo's life at the moment. The blonde haired man sat on his tattered and torn red sofa, his fingers twitching as he felt the alcohol seep through his veins. The ashtray was full, and the floor in a mess. Beer cans were found everywhere and Sanzo hasn't shaved in almost a week. He can be in what you called a living hell.

He turned his head towards the little side table that he had, with a picture of Goku and him. It was one of the rare occasions that he smiled in a picture, with his arms around Goku; even if that was something he would never ever seem to do. Sanzo grabbed the picture and slammed it onto the ground, shattering the glass frame. With that, he started to weep into his hands.

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_Flashback: _

It was a rather windy winter night, but the moon could be fully viewed in the sky. It was one of the rare times that Sanzo had time to bring Goku out for a meal, and just as expected, Goku was beyond ecstatic.

"Sanzo, can we have beef stew for supper? Please? I beg of you!" Goku bugged and tugged onto Sanzo's shirt as they walked out of a restaurant after finishing their dinner.

Sanzo was used to all the bugging and persistence that Goku had in him by now, they've been together for almost four years, and it seemed that they would have got married by now. However, things were not always as pretty as it seems. He sighed and took out a cigarette by habit, lighting it up quickly and taking in a deep drag. Somehow, Sanzo always needed to smoke when he was dealing with Goku's eating habits.

"Goku, you just ate. Think about supper _later_." Sanzo tried to be as calm as he could and took another drag off his cigarette.

"BUT beef stew is yummy! And I haven't tasted your beef stew in ages, Sanzo! I want to, I want to, I want to!" Goku persisted like a little kid. He spoke so fast, too, that anyone would be annoyed.

Immediately out of nowhere, a paper fan appeared in Sanzo's hand and landed hard onto Goku's head. Somehow, Sanzo always had that paper fan hidden somewhere in his cloak, and Goku could never ever find it, even if he was folding up Sanzo's clothes. It was a mystery yet to be solved.

He rubbed his head and scrunched up his face the best he could. Goku wasn't about to give up without a fight, but usually when the paper fan was used, he knew Sanzo wasn't in a mood to take his persistence. This time, Goku simply kept quiet and nodded, giving the saddest face he could, hoping that Sanzo would change his mind.

"But I didn't say that I won't cook it for you afterwards…" Sanzo started and watched Goku's face light up as he said those words. He put an arm around Goku and adjusted his coat. "...Come on, let's go home. Stop giving that face already." He finished with a warm smile.

As Goku looked up at Sanzo, his eyes widened. Sanzo looked so beautiful as he stood amidst the snow slowly falling from the sky, wearing that light blue scarf that Goku picked out for him for Christmas. And this time, it seemed as if Sanzo's eyes were so filled with love. Somehow Goku's little daydream ended when Sanzo gave him a good tug on his arm, urging him to the car.

Sanzo unlocked his big, black BMW that he loved so much. Remembering how he worked so hard to be one of the top in his company, just to buy this car that he has always wanted. A man of so much ambition has got what he always wanted, a BMW car, a high post in the office, a penthouse and now, someone he loved.

That was one of the happiest days in Sanzo's life. He cooked for Goku the moment they got back into the house and made Goku say _'Thank you, Sanzo'_ three times before he could touch the food. Sanzo seemed like such a cold person outside, but with Goku, he was always smiling and feeling warm inside.

"Thank you, Sanzo." Goku said once more after eating. He clasped his hands together and stared at Sanzo with his big brown eyes.

"…I only told you to say it three times, idiot." Sanzo scolded as he took the plate away from Goku and dumped it in the sink.

"I know, but thank you again…" Goku answered and ran up to Sanzo, jumping onto his back.

"H-HEY..!" Sanzo yelled loudly as Goku's weight took him by surprise. He staggered for a bit before finally settling down.

"…What was that all about?" Sanzo asked and arched an eyebrow, a little frustrated already.

"Nothing, I just felt like hugging you." Goku replied as he wrapped his arms around Sanzo's neck and buried his face in Sanzo's back like a little boy.

Sanzo sighed and saying nothing, he walked into their bedroom which was painted dark blue, and sat on the bed with Goku finally falling off and laughing as he rolled onto the bed. Sanzo wasn't a person of many words, but he certainly knew how to appreciate a moment.

Goku wasn't one to stay quiet for long, and he quickly wrapped his arms around Sanzo's waist and pulled him down onto the bed as well. Sanzo simply pursed his lips and pretended to be annoyed as he creased his eyebrows together and folded his arms, sitting up again.

"Don't be so childish!" He chided and looked at Goku's laughing face.

"Aw, Sanzo… Don't you want to play?" Goku asked childishly and reached over to grab Sanzo's hand.

Without thinking, Sanzo took his hand away and slapped off Goku's harshly. Standing up, he simply walked into the toilet to wash his face, leaving Goku on the bed. His whole body froze, not being able to move, Goku simply stared at the direction where Sanzo left, his eyes wide open. The feeling was indescribable, with every part of Goku's body freezing with emotional pain; his eyes began to water.

"W-What's wrong?" Sanzo asked when he walked out of the toilet and saw Goku that way. It didn't take him long to figure out what he just did. "…Oh my god, I'm so sorry… Goku, I'm so sorry…" He apologized over and over again.

Sanzo rushed towards the bed and hugged Goku tightly, knowing how he slapped Goku's hand away was the same way Goku's parents did to him when they abandoned him at a deserted house and he tried to reach out for them. Sanzo knew, he knew how bad it hurt Goku, and even so, he did it, again. The first time it happened, Goku had a mental breakdown and Sanzo was helpless, and hurt, that he hurt Goku that way.

He held Goku's head close to his chest, hugging him tightly and apologizing over and over again. Within time, Goku's breath seemed to have stabilized and he could move again; he lifted his head up to stare at Sanzo, in the small pathetic way that he always did.

"S-Sanzo…" He murmured as he stared in Sanzo's eyes.

"I'm here, Goku… I'm here." Sanzo replied, his voice straining.

"Don't leave me… Don't leave me the way _they_ did." Goku said with tears in his eyes.

"I won't; I will never leave you… And don't you ever leave me." Sanzo answered, his lip trembling.

"I won't leave you." Was all Goku said for the night as he rested in Sanzo's arms.

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Reviews are very much appreciated.


	2. Hope

_Author's Note: _Wow, Sanzo sure is emo, huh? Well, let's find out what he decides to do. Maybe he just needs a little help from Hakkai

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"Fucking sun," Sanzo cursed with a sleepy voice as the sun shone through his slightly dusty window.

He _was_ fast asleep on his bed, after twenty cans of beer from last night and didn't bother showing up for work that day. Sanzo's phone rang endlessly but he really couldn't give a damn. The moment he got out of bed and put on his bedroom slippers, the doorbell rang. Groaning out of frustration, he stuck a cigarette between his lips and lit it up, proceeding slowly to the door and opening it angrily.

"Yeah what do you want!" He shouted before looking at who the person was.

"To talk to you," A very familiar voice emitted as Sanzo looked up.

"Oh, it's you." Sanzo mumbled through puffs of smoke as he stared at Hakkai's forlorn face.

Hakkai made his own way into Sanzo's house and took a few whiffs of the air. It smelt of beer and cigarettes, nothing new, coming from Sanzo. He had been that way for a few months now, and it wasn't extremely inviting for anybody. He made himself comfortable on the little red sofa that Sanzo had and clasped his fingers together, staring up at Sanzo and smiling, as if questioning Sanzo's behaviour. Of course, he knew what had happened to Sanzo, but he never actually thought it would make such a big impact on his life.

"Yeah speak," Sanzo grumbled as he took the ashtray and flicked the cigarette ashes in it, feeling a little sour already.

"I'll come straight to the point. You have to stop being this way, Sanzo. It's already been three months." Hakkai said straightforwardly like he always did, he needed to help his friend of twelve years. Hakkai wasn't the type that would leave someone to rot and die.

"I don't want to talk about it." Sanzo replied simply and walked away from Hakkai and into the kitchen to get a glass of water.

Hakkai stood up and followed Sanzo, leaning against the kitchen door. It was a miracle that Sanzo was even drinking water and not some sort of alcohol in the morning. He knew what Sanzo's drinking patterns were like, but he wasn't in any sort of position to stop it.

"You have to face reality; he's gone, he's not going to be here anymore. I don't know why he did what he did, but I'm sure Goku-,"

Before Hakkai could even finish his sentence, Sanzo threw the glass at Hakkai's feet. Smashing into a million pieces, the glass was broken, exactly how Sanzo's heart was.

"DON'T EVER MENTION HIS NAME… EVER AGAIN!" Sanzo yelled loudly, the fury in his eyes indescribable.

Hakkai could say nothing to Sanzo's reaction and simply got a broom and dustpan and started cleaning up the mess, shaking his head at the same time. Somehow, he expected this sort of reaction from Sanzo. It was no doubt that Sanzo's temper needed some sort of control. However, Hakkai's prediction took an unexpected turn. At first, he heard little sniffing noises, and then he heard bawling. It was the most unusual thing that has happened to him since… forever.

Hakkai looked up and saw Sanzo sobbing into his palms, something he had never ever saw before. Even when Sanzo had been hit by a car ten years ago, he never ever shed a tear. Biting his lip, Hakkai stood up and walked over to Sanzo, putting a hand on his shoulder to offer comfort. It wasn't long before he guided Sanzo over to the sofa where he put an arm around Sanzo and sighed.

"I-I loved him, Hakkai… I fucking loved him so much… How could he do this to me? He lied… He said he'll never leave me. I-I just woke up one day, and he was gone. No note, no nothing. Just all the clothes gone, the dishes done, and the whole house cleaned… How could I ever be so stupid?" Sanzo cried out as the tears choked him a little.

"Didn't he drop any hints a few days before he left?" Hakkai tried to help, knowing that it was the only thing he could do.

"He seemed normal, I mean, fuck, he's always the same cheerful guy, isn't he? He knew, he knew how much I loved him… I've searched every single place for two months straight. I've searched his favourite eateries and departmental stores… Everyday for two months…" Sanzo explained in between sobs.

"Well, have you gone to a private investigator? Like those detectives kind of thing…" Hakkai asked and arched an eyebrow.

Sanzo paused for a moment and the tears suddenly stopped flowing and he looked up at Hakkai with the biggest bewilderment on his face.

"A-Actually, no…" He stammered as if there was hope to be found all over again.

It was at that point of time where Hakkai burst out laughing and shook his head. Indeed, there was hope, again.

"Well then, we'll go to my friend, Gojyo. He's a private investigator who can pick up traces of anybody, I promise you. See? This is going to be easy. We're going to find him, Sanzo, I promise you." Hakkai assured with a huge grin on his face.

The fact that Hakkai said 'I promise you' two times made Sanzo feel a whole lot better. He knew Hakkai never made empty promises and he didn't have anyone else to trust right now. He decided to go with Hakkai's decision. Getting up and grabbing some tissues to blow his nose and wiping his eyes dry, Sanzo had decided.

"Let's find him," He said simply and nodded.

"First, take a shower, if you please." Hakkai answered with a small laughter.

Sanzo couldn't help but give a half smile and headed back into his room, grabbing his towel and fresh clothes, finally heading for the shower after god knows how long. As he took his time in the shower shaving and showering, Hakkai helped pack Sanzo's house up. There was trash everywhere, and Hakkai was a cleanliness freak. Beer cans, peanut shells, empty potato chip bags, random plates and cutlery were just thrown around the room without a care. The smell was overbearing enough.

When Sanzo was done with his bath and headed back out into the living room, he was pleasantly surprised. Knowing Hakkai, the whole living room had been swiftly cleaned up and Hakkai had even dug up some old air freshener to spray around the room. Hakkai was seated on the red sofa and smiling to himself, satisfied with his performance.

"Wow…" Sanzo said as he dried his hair with the towel.

"Great, aren't I? Now, if you're ready, we can take my car and go." Hakkai stood up, stuffing his hands in his pockets and smiling even wider, now that his friend had cleaned up.

"O-Okay, I mean… Let me just put the towel away." And when Sanzo said that, he meant dumping the towel on the table and putting his shoes on.

As soon as they were in the car, Hakkai drove at high speed down the road, with loud music blasting through the stereos. They were off to a new adventure, and it certainly wasn't their first.

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PLEASE review if you read, it's really important to me so I can know whether you like the story or not, or rather, how I can improve more. Thank you very much to anyone who reads.


	3. Unexpected

_Authors' Note & Comment Replies: _

Thank you everyone who are still reading **Take My Hand**! It's hard for me to come up with a good plot behind this rather cliché story, if you have read **Under The Mask**. However, I hope that you guys will continue reading towards the end, as I always say, it wouldn't be your average happy ending.

**MissGoku: **Thank you for the encouragement!

**AngelKitten23: **Wow I remember you from my other story! Thank you for keeping up with my stories!

**GlorysGirl4ever: **o It'll be hard… But we'll see :D

**XxXGothic-RawXxX: **New chapter! Hope you like it!

**Aschentem: **Aww thank you! Oh you never know what would happen in the future…

**Anime Writer 2: **Here's a new chapter! Thank you!

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As the car stopped speeding and came to a halting stop in front of a rather shabby looking building, the sun seemed to be setting already. Somehow, Hakkai and Sanzo have been driving for six hours straight. It was in another state of the country and Sanzo was completely not prepared for six hours in the car. When Hakkai took off his seatbelt and beamed at Sanzo, his gaze was returned with dagger-like eyes that threatened to skin him alive.

"My, my, what's with that angry look, Sanzo? We're here already!" Hakkai said and pointed to the building which paint is peeling off and mould was growing around the sides.

"…Not only you didn't tell me that the drive was six hours, you totally did not prepare any food, or water, or cigarettes! Look! My cigarette pack is completely gone from three hours ago!" Sanzo growled and crumpled the cigarette pack in his hand before throwing it onto the dusty road.

"Just get a grip of yourself! After all, we're about to go to the state's best private investigator. Aren't you at all anxious to look for Goku?" Hakkai asked with a slight smile as he started walking into the building.

The name struck him like lightning. Of course, Sanzo wasted his sorrows away in alcohol for almost three months _because_ he lost that special someone. Biting his lip and furrowing his eyebrows as if he was annoyed, Sanzo jumped out of the car and chased after Hakkai.

By the time Sanzo reached Hakkai, they were in the elevator area. The place looked like it was abandoned, with no one in sight and old notices from the notice board were from a few years ago. Any little sound that the two men made would have ringed throughout the whole room, seeing how empty it was. Sanzo shuffled his feet and heaved a sigh. How could the state's best private investigator live in a slum like this? He wondered if Hakkai was in the right state of mind to bring him to such a place.

"The elevator's here." Hakkai said and poked Sanzo's side to wake him up from his little daydream.

Sanzo was a little startled, but didn't let it show. Instead he shoved his hands in his pockets and followed Hakkai into the elevator. The elevator had some kind of a musky smell from so long ago. It wasn't anything highly unpleasant or intolerable, but just somewhat distinctive enough not to be ignored. Twitching his nose, he stared at Hakkai's unchanging face as the elevator reached the fifth story.

Getting out of the elevator and taking a rather long left turn to the very last apartment-looking house of the corridor, Hakkai knocked on a brown door with a foot mat in the front that says 'Welcome'. Within seconds, Sanzo heard the few locks behind the door being unlocked; and when the door finally swung open, the person standing behind it was someone Sanzo completely did not expect.

"YO! Hakkai! Long time no see! SANZO!!!" The red-head shouted in glee and ran towards Sanzo and grabbed the annoyed man.

It was Gojyo, the childhood friend of both Hakkai and Sanzo who moved to another state a few years ago. Sanzo should have known from the weird look in Hakkai's smile before they entered the building. Sanzo and Gojyo were known not to get along, and the only time they did, was when they were secretly smoking behind that school yard together and keeping a lookout for teachers or anyone who would catch them. The face on Sanzo's face when he saw Gojyo after so many years was priceless.

"Come, let's go in! We have plenty to talk about! Hakkai already called me beforehand, and I've found out a bunch of information that might be quite useful to our search!" Gojyo said as he dragged Sanzo in with a rather playful smile on his face.

"Just take your hands off me! I'm not handicapped!" Sanzo snapped as he pushed Gojyo away and walked in by himself.

Hakkai did nothing but stood there and chuckled to himself as he saw how these two started bickering the moment they met each other. They were always the same, this way. They cared for each other, but would only show it through their teasing. He followed the two in and was a little surprised by how big and well kept Gojyo's office was.

"Surprised, aren't you?" Gojyo turned around and said with a wink. "I live here and work here. Isn't this the best life in the world?"

"For a loser, yes." Sanzo answered and smirked, snatching one of Gojyo's cigarettes from the table and lighting it up like it was heaven.

Rolling his eyes, Gojyo lit a cigarette up himself. Hakkai simply sat in one of the chairs and observed the surroundings. They were in what Gojyo called the _office_. It was completely different from how the living room was. It was not only dirty and messy; there were piles and stacks of different papers lying around the desk, a trash can that was not emptied and coffee stains everywhere. Plus, it smelt horrible. Shaking his head, he simply crossed his arms and smiled.

"Y-You said you found out some things about… Goku," Sanzo started after taking a long drag off his cigarette.

He arched his eyebrow, cigarette in hand, and looked at Sanzo's expression. It seemed full of hope, but yet his eyes were deep with sorrow. Gojyo couldn't help but feel sorry for his long time friend.

"Actually, yes, he is in Europe right now; Germany to be exact." Gojyo replied after putting out his cigarette and grabbing some papers from the desk and reading them.

"How do you know?" Sanzo's eyes lit up and slammed his palms on the table, causing several items to shake.

Gojyo stood up and took a few steps back and forth, his finger tapping his chin. He finally put a hand around Sanzo and whispered in his ear.

"…It's a _secret_."

He sniggered and pursed his lips. There was nothing Gojyo wouldn't do to annoy the hell out of Sanzo, and a few years certainly did not change that.

"Why you little…" Sanzo growled as he prepared to punch Gojyo, but was evidently held back by Hakkai. Hakkai was like the peacemaker among these two.

"Well, if you really have to know, it's from a source. Of course, I can't reveal it, or where would my status as the state's best private investigator go? But let me tell you that my sources are never wrong. Heck, I even have his address there. I guess it's safe to assume that you're going there?" Gojyo asked seriously for once and lit up another cigarette.

Sanzo didn't even hesitate and immediately called up his company's travel agent, booking a flight for three to Germany. The other two men were simply dumbfounded at how fast Sanzo's actions were. He didn't even take a second to think or consider. But of course, it was because of Goku.

"…Why are you booking a flight for three?" Gojyo asked after Sanzo clicked off the phone call.

"Because you and Hakkai are obviously coming," Sanzo replied nonchalantly. Hakkai arched his eyebrow for a brief moment, but did not hesitate.

"What in the world… Don't go around making plans for me!" Gojyo yelled and gritted his teeth. "I still have jobs to do!"

"Big deal, you're coming and that's the end of the story. Pack your bags. Both of you are coming home with me and we're leaving on the first flight tomorrow. Hakkai, prepare for a drive home." Sanzo said calmly and lit up another cigarette and waited for their reactions.

However both Gojyo and Hakkai knew not to mess with Sanzo when he's in such a serious mood. Taking a deep breath, Gojyo went into his room and started packing his suitcase. For a second there, under his strong mask, Sanzo actually felt glad to have these two friends.

"Let's go, or do you actually want to wait any longer?" Gojyo asked as he came back in the office with a small brown suitcase.

Without hesitation, Sanzo immediately walked out of the door, followed by Hakkai and Gojyo. As they hopped into the car and Hakkai started the engine, Sanzo prepared himself as he went on the trip of his lifetime.

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Thank you for taking time to read my story. It means a lot to me.


	4. I Found You

Upon entering the aircraft and sitting down in their allocated seats, Sanzo heaved a heavy sigh. Was it just his imagination? He was actually on a flight to Germany, just to look for Goku. But he didn't care, he needed answers. The longer this situation went on, the more his heart ached and his mind spun.

What irritated him even more at this point of time, was the no smoking signs that were put up on the plane and the bathrooms. He cursed silently and put on his shades, trying to get some sleep. But of course, Gojyo just had to make some sort of noise to disturb him.

"Sanzo!!! Get up! There's a hot air stewardess in the next cabin! Let's both go take a look, come on!!" He whispered a little too loudly into Sanzo's ear. It was unfortunate for Sanzo to be sitting next to Gojyo. Right now he secretly wished that he could have changed to a different seat while he could.

Rolling his eyes under his dark sunglasses, he took them off hastily and glared at Gojyo.

"I am NOT interested, do you understand?! All I want now is some _rest_! Idiot!" He growled nastily as he continued glaring at Gojyo for a few more seconds before finally putting on his sunglasses again and tried to sleep once more.

Gojyo pouted and nudged Hakkai playfully, asking him the same thing he asked Sanzo, but of course, Hakkai always knew how to put restless Gojyo in his spot, and telling him to quiet down before Sanzo pulled out a gun on him.

"Wow- SANZO HAS A GUN?!!?!" Gojyo yelled loudly in surprise, standing up at the same time. It was then when he reached Sanzo's limit.

Sanzo yanked Gojyo down by his collar and looked into his eye threateningly. It wasn't at all a funny joke to pull on the plane, especially in these days when security was so tight.

"You bastard, you could get me into some deep trouble with those ridiculous words of yours! Fuck, you're better off thrown off a plane before-,"

Before Sanzo could even continue, two pretty buff looking men came to their seat and showed them some I.D badges. They looked pretty stern, creasing their eyebrows and frowning. Hakkai immediately knew it wasn't a good situation.

"Ah, officers sir, let me just explain here… This young man beside me was simply making a false exclamation. You see, we were just joking around and he didn't know-," Hakkai tried to finish his sentence, but was pushed away by the two officers.

"Sir, we are the in-flight F.B.I agents. We were notified that you were carrying a gun with you. I would have to ask you to put your arms behind your head and get out of your seat please. In any case of hesitation or rebellion, I would have to handcuff you. Now please," The officer with the brown moustache said in a harsh voice.

"What the- Fine, you'll get it from me later on, Gojyo." Sanzo growled as he stood up and left his seat.

"Sir in the red hair, I would ask that you come with us as well. We were notified that you were the one that caused the alarm of a gun on-board." The next officer said.

"B-But I didn't do anything! I was just-," By then, the officer had already grabbed him out of his seat and dragged him to the last cabin.

Sanzo was beyond pissed off by this point of time. He wanted to strangle Gojyo for getting him into this mess. Great; now he had to spend probably a few hours explaining himself, and maybe if Gojyo wasn't too busy trying to be an asshole, he could spend some time trying to clear their name, too.

In the back cabin there was nobody except some crew members and two chairs. Gojyo and Sanzo were made to sit on those chairs, and were handcuffed immediately. The officers explained that the handcuffs would only be taken away if they were cleared of all suspicion. Sanzo's angry eyes glared over to Gojyo, whose eyes refused to meet Sanzo's.

"Now then, Sir in the red hair, is what you say really true? Is this man carrying a gun on-board? Now you do know that lying or covering up the truth would be an offense. I request that you tell us everything that happened from the start." The officer's moustache twitched as his eyebrows creased even further. The other officer stood with his arms folded and his eyes glowing rather menacingly.

"W-Well, that is… You see, my friend Hakkai and I were just making a joke on how Sanzo here would kill me with a gun… And I got a little carried away, that's all." Gojyo stuttered a little as he looked down on the ground.

"I am sorry sir, but your explanation is not sufficient; you should know that these days possessing a gun or any flammable item on board are extremely dangerous. I request that you re-think your answer please." The officer with the moustache said again.

"Didn't he already tell you what happened?! Now un-cuff me! You can search me if you want! I have NO gun you idiots!" Sanzo shouted loudly as he tried to un-cuff himself with no success.

The officer's moustache twitched again and raised an eyebrow while kind of menacingly glaring at Sanzo's rudeness. He immediately instructed the other officer to search Sanzo with no hesitation to hit him if there was any rebellion. Gojyo too, was to be searched for precaution.

The other officer was rather rough with his searching and didn't hesitate taking Sanzo and Gojyo's clothes off until he was satisfied that there was no gun with them. However that was not enough; Sanzo and Gojyo's baggage were all brought to the back cabin and searched thoroughly before Sanzo and Gojyo were left to re-pack everything neatly back in. The officers finally reluctantly left back for their original seats and Sanzo and Gojyo were cleared of any offence. They returned to their own seats; and were greeted by Hakkai's smiling face.

"So how did it go?" Hakkai asked innocently with a grin.

"Don't ask such a meaningless question, idiot!" Sanzo grumbled and returned to his seat.

"Well, I thought it was quite interesting, to say the least, they didn't beat us up." Gojyo replied and gave a hi-five to Hakkai.

"YOU BASTARD! MAKE ANYMORE TROUBLE AND I _WILL_ KILL YOU!" Sanzo shouted again before Hakkai calmed him down and pushed him back gently into his seat.

"Get some sleep now, Sanzo, we will be reaching in about five hours. You need rest. It will be morning when we arrive." Hakkai said and calmed Sanzo down.

"Ooh F.B.I agents! Help! He's trying to kill me again!" Gojyo teased and stuck out his tongue playfully while laughing to himself rather insanely.

This time Sanzo simply ignored Gojyo and shut his eyes. His thoughts wandered to Goku, as they always did before he went to sleep. He thought of Goku's smiling face and his toothy grin. It was hard for Sanzo to live like this, and it was even harder for him to try and forget Goku. He thought he would be alone forever all his life, until he accepted Goku into his life. And even though he knew it would be him to forget it, he just couldn't do it this time. He twirled his thumbs as he opened up his eyes again to stare out of the plane. Imagining Goku was among those clouds, Sanzo wished that he could stretch out his hand to find him.

The plane ride was finally over five hours later when Hakkai woke Sanzo up. Apparently Gojyo had fallen asleep too and was drooling with his mouth open onto Sanzo's coat. He rolled his eyes in disgust and made a mental note to thrash away that coat later. The plane made a rather smooth landing and the sunlight beamed into the harsh winter morning of Germany.

"_Ladies and Gentlemen, we have now arrived in Germany. The temperature now is minus three degrees celcius-,"_

Sanzo stood up and grabbed his bag from the overhead compartment before leaving the aircraft with Hakkai and Gojyo tagging along behind. Just as he was about to leave the aircraft, the two F.B.I agents appeared again, thanking them for the co-operation earlier on. Muttering a 'fuck you,' under his breath, Sanzo said nothing else and made his way into the airport. Hakkai waved goodbye to the officers and followed Sanzo quickly.

The first thing that Sanzo did when he was out of the airport was to light up, and so did Gojyo. Hakkai stood there and shook his head while smiling and folding his arms, thanking God that he wasn't a smoker. It would be quite annoying, while not being able to smoke in certain places.

After they were finally done, they took a taxi to a rather cheap but grand looking hotel that Hakkai has found for them over the internet.

"It was the only place that allowed me to make such a sudden reservation." Hakkai said and shrugged with a smile as they exited the taxi with their baggage.

"I never said it was a problem." Sanzo said with a cigarette in his mouth.

After room checking-in and settling down, their journey finally started. Grabbing the address that Gojyo had scribbled down in a paper, Sanzo and the rest hopped into a taxi again and muttered out the address in some sort of Japanese-accented german which didn't exactly exist. They finally had to show the cab driver the address which was written, and the cab driver understood.

On the way, they passed by many magnificent towns and sights which they had no time to look at; however, Sanzo was too busy thinking about what he would say to Goku after such a long time. Should he get angry? Should he talk to Goku nicely? Sanzo had no clue. All the could do was to wait for the moment and react accordingly. He should at least get a proper explanation even if Goku did not want to go back to Japan with him.

They finally reached a gloomy looking town where a lot of old people seemed to reside in. It wasn't exactly a very exciting place to be in, but it was where the cab driver took them to. After paying and exiting the taxi, they looked for house number 73 which was supposed to be where Goku was staying. Sanzo found it in a matter of minutes and stood in front of the dark brown house, a little hesitant to press the bell. If he shouted for Goku to come out, would Goku be afraid? Indeed, Sanzo knew that he was some sort of an intimidating person at times.

Out of nowhere, he heard the doorbell rung. Turning to look beside him was Gojyo, who winked at Sanzo. Sanzo bit his lip, not knowing whether to thank Gojyo or to punch the living daylights out of him.

Finally, the door creaked open a little, and all Sanzo saw was a big dark brown eye peeping out from the small space. It was no mistake; that was Goku.

The door was immediately shut again with a huge loud bang. This came as no surprise to Sanzo. He bit his lip even harder, holding back his tears. Sanzo pounded at the door for fifteen minutes straight to no avail. He screamed and shouted Goku's name till he was brought to his knees. Hakkai and Gojyo could do nothing, and it wasn't like they dared to approach Sanzo at a time like this. It was an extremely hard and painful time for Sanzo and they didn't know what exactly to do.

Finally, Hakkai took a walk around the house and found a garage door connected to the house that wasn't locked. He hurried back to the front and told Sanzo and Gojyo to come quietly. They entered the garage, which had no car, or anything in it, and found that the door to the house was not locked as well. Sanzo entered the house without hesitation.

It was a rather new looking house, despite from its outlook, and Sanzo was rather taken aback by the amount of photos of Goku and some girl that was placed all over the house. It wasn't until he heard a glass shattering onto the floor. Sanzo spun to his right and saw Goku standing there, behind the pieces of smashed glass.

They stood there, staring at each other for a few seconds, none of them being able to move or speak. The situation was too intense, and someone _had _to make a move. It was just a matter of who it would be.

"So it's you, Goku!" A voice came out.

Goku and Sanzo's eyes both followed the voice to the red-head. As annoying as always, he had a cigarette in his mouth and grinned widely, giving a 'yo' to Goku.

Goku's eyes began to water as he swallowed hard, biting his lip furiously as he finally managed to choke out some words.

"W-W-What… Are you doing here?!" He muttered out with all his courage.

"Isn't it obvious, Goku? I came here to find… you." Sanzo replied as his eyes looked down, his fingernails digging into his flesh.

"I-I have nothing to say. Nothing to say at all," Goku said as his tears started rolling down his cheeks, and fell onto his knees, sobbing rather hysterically as glass cut into his hands.

Sanzo immediately rushed to Goku's side and pulled him away from the glass pieces, tending to his cuts quickly, with Goku sniffing. After that was done, the both of them were seated in the kitchen, facing each other. Hakkai and Gojyo naturally sensed that it was a stressful time for the both of them, and decided to wait in the garage.

"…Why did you go? Was I not good enough for you? Do you not love me any longer? Answer me." Sanzo bombarded Goku with his questions as he broke the ice between the both of them.

"I…I…" Goku couldn't answer and bit his lip again, this time tearing the skin and making it bleed slightly. Finally he took a deep breath and decided to give Sanzo the answer he was searching for.

"My sister. She has an incurable disease that runs in the family. She will pass away soon, and since it is heritable, I might have it too. I do not want to be a burden to you." Goku answered lamely as he stared at his fingers.

"Your sister?! YOUR SISTER IS THE BEST ANSWER YOU CAN GIVE ME?!" Sanzo yelled and immediately left the seat, running upstairs to look for Goku's sister in a rage of madness.

"W-WAIT SANZO- YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT MY SISTER IS LIKE-," Goku yelled after Sanzo.

Sanzo opened the door, and immediately found a teenage girl with long brown hair, and the biggest golden eyes he has ever seen, sitting on the bed, looking perfectly fine.

"So _you_ are the famous Sanzo that I had to tear my brother away from." She spoke through her pursed lips. She wore a pink frilly dress with lace gloves and was rather prim and proper.

"Lillian you don't understand; he was just here for a visit, I will get him out soon, don't worry!" Goku yelled from behind and rushed to Lillian's side.

"What kind of sickness is this, Goku?" Sanzo glared at Goku, knowing that Lillian is perfectly fine.

Without hesitation, Lillian stood up and stared at the both of them from head to toe. There was some sort of unexplainable madness in her eyes that made her movements look unpredictable. It was rather frightening, especially for a young and beautiful girl like Lillian.

"You are the man that has kept my brother away from me for years. You will pay, bastard." She spoke those filthy words through her mouth as she moved forward towards Sanzo.

Sanzo did not step back or try to stop her. Goku tried to pull her back but was pushed away by Lillian. She pulled out a knife from under her bed and pointed it at Sanzo. Goku's eyes widened and his mouth went agape.

"NO Lillian! Don't! I'm sorry, I will be with you forever, I promise! PLEASE! DON'T DO IT!" Goku yelled as he rushed towards Lillian, trying to grab her, who turned around and slapped Goku harshly.

"You liar; you promised me you will never see this man again. You lied and I believed you. You liar, you shall pay for this after I kill this pathetic man who took my brother away from me. And after that, we can be together again, Goku." Lillian grinned sinisterly and pointed the knife back at Sanzo, who still did not move an inch.

"My brother never came back home… Even when mother was ill and passed on, he never came back… I was left all alone, in this damned house, to face everything on my own. Was it worth, seeing my brother walk away for another man? I never had any friends… And all along, Goku and mother were the only people I held on to. And you, Sanzo, took my only brother away from me! YOU WILL PAY!" Lillian screamed madly as tears rolled down her cheeks furiously.

"Lillian, I never left you… Mother and father left me and told me to leave… Don't you remember? Please, I beg of you… Please don't blame Sanzo any longer. It isn't his fault. Please…" Goku begged as his own tears welled up in his eyes as his voice weakened. His body was robbed of any strength that was left in it.

She was in an insane state of madness as she rushed towards Sanzo, who still did not move an inch. Sanzo was too much shock absorbing everything he has heard. He was facing danger the moment he found Goku again; and Lillian was serious about killing him, he could see it in her dangerously beautiful golden eyes. Sanzo stared straight at Lillian's rushing body towards him. Everything was moving in slow motion. His mind took him back to the day where he first met Goku. It was a whole blur, how he even fell in love with this man who he had never thought would bring him so much joy.

It finally came; he saw her coming closer and closer with the blade. He knew she was going to do it. Sanzo closed his eyes, and prepared for the worst to come. Maybe it was good that it ended like that, maybe everyone will be happy again. Goku could live in peace without knowing that Sanzo was out there in confusion, Hakkai and Gojyo could lead their normal lives again, and he… He would be freed of all these pain and misery. All the nights of drinking, staying up and watching television aimlessly; Sanzo could finally free his mind.

A scream was heard and a loud groan of pain sounded. Sanzo did not feel any pain or anything entering his body. He opened his eyes, and saw a familiar figure standing in front of him. Goku had shielded him.

"GOKU!!!" Sanzo yelled and caught Goku's weak falling body.

Lillian shrieked with fear and madness as her whole body convulsed with spasms and couldn't stop shaking. She had stabbed her own brother. Lillian paused to look at her hands stained with Goku's blood. Her eyes darted over to her older brother who was coughing out blood, and whose wound in his stomach was bleeding incessantly.

"I-I killed… I killed G-Goku. I-I… I can't be forgiven." She muttered to herself as she stared at her hands.

Lillian looked around nervously, not knowing what will happen. The blade was still in her hand as her eyes darted from place to place insanely. Finally, she gave a loud scream and sliced her throat open. It was then that Lillian's self-torture had came to an end as she fell onto the ground lifeless.

Sanzo had no reaction, and Goku didn't seem to be focusing on anything else except Sanzo's eyes. It was ironic, how Sanzo had finally found his loved one, but had to lose him all over again, this time maybe for forever. His face crumbled up in tears as he held Goku's body close to his, using his fingers to run through Goku's hair. Goku wasn't able to say a word even though he tried his best; every time he tried, he would choke on his own blood. Blood was all over the floor, and it seemed that the two siblings were finally reunited as one when Goku's and Lillian's blood merged into one big puddle.

"HELP!" Sanzo yelled as his legs refused to get up from the floor. He yelled at the top of his voice, hoping that Hakkai or Gojyo would run in to save him.

Three men came running in as they pulled out a stretcher quickly and swiftly carried Goku on it. Sanzo was in a state of blur, until he saw Hakkai and Gojyo's faces from the doorway. They had called the police and ambulance when he heard the shouts and screams coming from the room. It seems like Hakkai's intelligence was always needed around emergency situations. Everything was happening so quickly that Sanzo wasn't able to follow any longer. Soon, he felt his head hit the floor as he was swept off to the darkness.


End file.
